Taboo
by bionic4ever
Summary: Tab1: For the JaimeOscar shippers: Jaime and Oscar have no intentions of becoming a couple, but fate and Steve may have other plans. For NeesiePie, with thanks for her patience and input, and as always, thanks to Julie.
1. Chapter 1

**Taboo**

Chapter One

"Have you seen Steve since you've been a free woman again?" Oscar asked cautiously. Jaime had been out of the hospital for nearly a month, and as he walked through downtown Ojai with her, trying to judge her emotional and physical recovery, Oscar was relieved to see the glow had begun to return to her cheeks, and the spring to her step. Many of the damaged brain cells that had caused Jaime's amnesia had been surgically regenerated, but in the portion of her mind and her heart where Steve should've been, all that remained was a blank, empty feeling.

"Twice," she said softly, "when he's been between assignments." Jaime sighed, and her eyes grew distant and sad.

"What is it, Babe? Did something happen?"

"No. That's the trouble; _nothing_ happened. Oscar, I tried so hard!"

"Maybe that's the problem."

"Huh?"

"Don't try; it has to come naturally." Oscar was well aware of how close Steve and Jaime had been before the amnesia. They'd been so _right_ together. His heart broke for both of them, for what they'd lost – possibly forever.

"What if it doesn't?" Jaime said, forcing back a tear. "What if it's just...gone?"

"You can't force a feeling that just isn't there. Steve knows that, and yes, it hurts him, but he's learned to accept it."

"Well, I haven't! It isn't fair!" As they crossed the wide, green lawn next to the library, Jaime sat on one of the swings and pensively dug her toes into the sand. "Don't get me wrong; I'm grateful to be alive right now. I know I shouldn't be."

Oscar knew that initially, Jaime had _not _been a happy recipient of the 'miracle' of bionics. She'd been mad as hell that she hadn't been allowed to die. So, even though he dreaded the answer, he had to ask the question. "You're grateful...but are you happy, Jaime?"

"To be alive? Or just in general?"

"Both."

Jaime paused at the unexpected query. "If I _had_ died, I would've never seen this day, with the sky so bright, the warm breeze, the fresh air. And I'd never have gotten the chance to find out that the Director of the OSI is really a softie at heart."

"Who – me?" Oscar allowed himself a wide, pleasant grin. "Watch what you say, Sommers. In some circles, that could be considered slander."

"Yeah, right." Jaime chuckled, and Oscar relaxed at the sound. "I guess what I'm saying is, yes, I am happy I didn't die. _And _grateful...to you."

"Steve had a lot to do with it too, you know."

"But it was your rubber stamp -"

Oscar pretended to stiffen, but his voice was almost playful. "I'll have you know that I have never once used a 'rubber stamp'. Each and every one of my signatures is in pure ink, and probably quite collectible."

"Oh, really? I'll have to start saving copies of all my assignment notes, then. _If _I ever get any." She turned her head to look directly at him, and was a little surprised to see that when Oscar wasn't in boss mode, his whole face seemed different. _How can such gentle eyes be so deep?_ Jaime thought to herself, hoping he couldn't see how he'd suddenly distracted her. She almost wished she didn't have to ask a 'boss' question. "So, when _do_ I get to come back, anyway?"

Oscar smiled. He was noticing he did a lot of that when he was with Jaime. "Do you know how many of my operatives would practically kill for some R & R?"

"So give it to one of them," she said lightly. "I wanna work."

"Says the operative who is currently seated on a playground swing?" he teased. When she started to get up, though, he shook his head. "No – don't do that. It...sort of suits you." _Watch it, Goldman,_ his head warned his heart. _You're about to step into dangerous territory. Take a nice, deep breath and a giant step backward._ In deference to his good sense, Oscar stopped talking, but instead of backing away he took another step closer. _Damn, she's beautiful...!_

The 'man/woman' vibe hit them both at the same time, but it felt shocking and strange, and they both shook it off as quickly as it had appeared. Startled, Jaime jumped from the swing, then did a happy little twirl in front of him, ending with a flourish and a bow.

"See?" she chirped. "One fully recovered agent, fit and ready for duty!"

_And definitely in fine form..._Oscar's head and his heart were – for once – in total agreement.

- - - - - -

Later, when Jaime had returned home and Oscar had settled into his hotel room for the night, both were dwelling on the same thing: thoughts that, for two very separate sets of reasons, they knew they could _never_ act upon.

Jaime longed to be able to do the work her bionically-redesigned body had been equipped for, and she wasn't about to let a kind smile and a pair of deep, mesmerizing eyes stand in her way.

For Oscar, the employer/employee taboo loomed too large to ignore. He'd _earned_ his position and its accompanying status, and did not intend to place all of his hard work in jeopardy now.

- - - - - -


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

One week after his visit to Ojai, Oscar faced a dilemma. Jaime _wanted_ to work and Rudy had released her to do so, saying she was in the best shape of her life. (Oscar had no argument there!) Objectively, he knew she could be one of his best operatives. Her intelligence and her bionic abilities, combined with an outward look of fragility that would cause an enemy to underestimate her, made an unbeatable combination. Oscar wasn't sure why, but the thought of sending Jaime into dangerous situations suddenly made his heart cringe.

The kidnapping of three United States diplomats in the jungles of Paraguay left no more time for him to wonder or worry. It would take every special skill bionics provided to find the hostages quickly and extract them without incident. Jaime's hearing would be a necessary tool; so would Steve's sight. Oscar was sending them both, and his worry about his friends' safety was tempered by the thought that – just maybe – Steve and Jaime could find a way to re-ignite their spark once the mission was completed.

Steve had already been briefed and was conferring with their pilot when Jaime got to Oscar's office. Oscar quickly detailed the assignment for her, and they sat quietly, waiting for Steve to return. Several times, their eyes met in what would've been meaningful glances if they'd allowed themselves to acknowledge that, but – of course – _nothing_ was happening between them. It was out of the question. Impossible.

"You know," Jaime said, as a way to break the silence, "I was worried you were gonna tell me we were parachuting in."

Oscar got up and walked around the desk, then pulled a chair next to Jaime's, seating himself at her level. "Babe, I'd never do that to you: not yet. It's too soon to even consider -" Her eyes grabbed his own, holding the gaze with a force that made them both shudder.

"I know it'll have to happen someday," Jaime said nervously. She was talking about jumping from a plane, but another inevitability was beginning to occur to both of them, although they didn't dare voice their thoughts to anyone, especially each other.

"When you're ready," Oscar told her gently, "and not one minute before then." He knew he should be back at his desk and not gazing into his operative's eyes, but the pull was nearly irresistible. Jaime started to say something, but found herself breathless.

"Pilot's all set, whenever you're ready to go," Steve said, striding brisking into the office. He froze mid-step when he saw Oscar and Jaime jump slightly in their chairs, startled out of a look that Steve could only describe as moonstruck. Oscar returned to his desk as Jaime turned to smile at Steve. "How've you been?" he asked, finally venturing the rest of the way into the room.

"Great. It's good to see you again...Partner." Jaime rose to her feet. "And I'm all set to go. Oscar, we'll see you when we get back."

"Be careful," Oscar cautioned. Jaime headed toward the elevator, and Oscar called Steve back. "Watch out for her, Pal," he requested, his worry plainly visible on his face.

- - - - - -

Jaime and Steve sat in the back of the plane, working out every detail of their planned strategy, then found themselves with some time to kill. The two former lovers relaxed together with a thermos of coffee, each one trying to picture what was going on in the other's mind.

Steve finally _had_ to ask. "So...what's up with you and Oscar?"

"Huh?"

Steve grinned broadly at her. "Hey, it's ok. I'm just curious."

"Curious...about what?" Jaime seemed genuinely puzzled.

"You can tell me it's none of my business, but we _are_ friends, if you wanna talk about it..."

"Talk about _what?"_

"Jaime," Steve chuckled, "I didn't need bionic vision to see what was going on in there this morning."

"Austin, have you lost your mind?" While Jaime's voice was lightly indignant, inside she froze. _Oh, God...if he says he saw something, maybe I wasn't imagining things...!_

"You don't have to be embarrassed; just be careful – for your sake, and his."

"Let's look at the map again, just to be sure," Jaime hedged, opening the map and closing the subject.

- - - - - -

The mission was brief, intense and ultimately successful. After Steve and Jaime saw their three newly-rescued charges onto a separate Federal transport plane, they collapsed in two exhausted heaps for their own flight back to DC. "Nice work, Partner," Steve told Jaime. She'd kept up with him every step of the way, proving herself to be an up-and-coming match for his own abilities.

"Thanks. We make a good team."

"Always did," Steve added lightly. "You're weren't uncomfortable working with me, were you?"

"Of course not. You helped train me for this; I know how good you are. But...are you ok?"

"Yeah – just really tired."

"Me, too, but you know that's not what I meant."

"Jaime, what happened between us...yeah, it hurt - a lot...but it isn't anyone's fault, and there isn't anything we can do to change it. If I can be in your life as a friend, close enough to know that you're safe and happy...then I'm happy, too." _If it can't be me in your heart, _Steve thought, _you could do a lot worse than Oscar. He definitely cares about you._ He could tell she was nowhere near ready to talk about that yet.

Jaime turned to look at him, and they exchanged warm, comfortable smiles before they both fell asleep.

- - - - - -


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"She really did us proud," Steve told Oscar when he and Jaime got back to OSI Headquarters. "No bloodshed, no gunfire and all the 'perps' in custody – just like on TV. We even got outta there a day ahead of schedule. You'd never know she was still a rookie."

"It's all in the training," Jaime responded, smiling at the two men who had trained her. "It took a lot out of both of us, but sleeping for most of the return flight helped a lot."

Steve couldn't help noticing that when Jaime's eyes met Oscar's, she quickly looked away, blushing, while Oscar's smile doubled in its width. "I'd imagine Rudy wants to see us?" he concluded, then turned to Jaime. "Standard procedure. I'll head down there first, if you want."

Jaime nodded. "Let me know when it's my turn."

When Steve was gone, Oscar leaned back in his chair and looked carefully at Jaime, trying to judge her state of mind. "How was it, working with Steve?"

"Ok. We really seemed to be in sync, backing each other up without even needing to discuss it."

"Wonderful: exactly what I wanted to hear." He paused, wondering if the mission had served its dual purpose but not wanting to pry. "And did the two of you get a chance to talk?"

"Yeah." Jaime looked down at the floor, her eyes growing distant and sad.

"Jaime?" Oscar said, very gently.

"No matter how much I wanted it to be different – to feel what I used to feel – there wasn't anything there," she told him with a quiver in her voice.

"Maybe it'll come, if you give it time -"

"Oscar, the surgery gave me back a lot of memories I didn't have before, but with Steve and me...there's nothing. I mean, we're friends, of course, but the rest is just gone."

A lone tear trailed down Jaime's cheek, and Oscar's heart went out to her, for the pain and guilt he knew she was feeling. He got up from the desk to hand her the box of tissues and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder as she tried to compose herself.

"Don't try to force it, Babe," he said softly.

"I feel worse for Steve. I can only imagine what we had, but he _knows_, and he's lost so much..."

"Steve understands." Oscar told her, his hand still resting on her shoulder, the fingers massaging slightly in a gesture of comfort. Jaime looked up at him, and he crouched lower to look into her eyes. "You can't beat yourself up over something you can't control." He reached over to brush the tear from Jaime's cheek, and their eyes were once again magnetically drawn to each other. The touch, intended to be merely kind and sympathetic, felt electric, and Oscar had to reluctantly force himself to take his hand away, to not run it through her hair or caress her skin.

Jaime debated telling him about the rest of her conversation with Steve, but Oscar's touch and the expression on his face melted her resolve and the words simply tumbled out. "Steve thinks..." _God, how do I say this?_

"Thinks what?" Oscar prompted.

"He...thinks there's something going on between us." They were still gazing directly into each other's eyes as Oscar stood up. "But there can't be," she continued, unable to look away. Jaime's shoulder and her cheek felt warm where he had touched her, but she knew they'd be treading into forbidden territory to even consider the possibility...

"There shouldn't be," Oscar affirmed, returning to his chair.

Steve rejoined them, having seen just enough through the open office door to knock on the frame and alert them as he entered. "Rudy's not there; he left a note on the door, saying he'd have to see us tomorrow. Guess that means we're all free for tonight."

Oscar nodded. "How about letting me take you both out to dinner, to celebrate Jaime's returning to the fold so successfully?"

"Ok," Jaime answered, a little too quickly.

"I'm kinda tired. Why don't the two of you go, and I'll grab something quick on the way home. I could use a little more shut-eye." _And the two of you could use some alone-time. _On the inside, as well as the outside, Steve was grinning.

- - - - - -

"Could Steve have been any more obvious?" Jaime mused over the first glass of wine.

"He cares about you; he just wants you to be happy," Oscar stated simply. _Let **me** make you happy, Jaime. _"Are you?"

Jaime marveled at the depth of the feelings starting to take control of her heart, and could see those same feelings mirrored in the smiling eyes that watched her from across the table. "I could be," she whispered.

The dimly lit restaurant, the wine and the exhilaration of success completely erased any thoughts of work or propriety from their minds. Reality blurred just enough that the Director of the OSI and his most promising young operative were no longer at the table. In their place were a man and a woman focused solely on each other. They lingered over coffee, knowing that once they stepped outside they'd have to re-enter the real world, where the thoughts they'd begun to allow themselves were simply not permitted.

- - - - - -


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Jaime adored her apartment over Jim and Helen's carriage house, in Ojai. She'd fixed it up exactly the way she liked it, with furnishings she loved. Why, all of a sudden, was she so reluctant to return to it? Washington DC was not her home; it never had been. As she slowly paced the floor of her OSI-supplied apartment, she tried to come up with a reason not to take tomorrow's flight to California – a reason that wasn't _Oscar._

_I do **not **have a 'thing' for my boss,_ she reasoned. _I __**can't**! Dammit – I know better! He's not just my boss; he's Director of the OSI! And he's old enough to be my father...well, a young father, anyway. Give it up, Jaime. It'll never happen. You can't let it happen. But...why not? Behind that gruff, serious exterior, he's one of the kindest men I've ever known. He's rugged, handsome and those eyes...!_

Never in Jaime's life had her logic and good sense waged such a battle with her heart. Even though it was past midnight, she headed out the door, instinctively drawn down the street to the one place she knew of in DC where she could hear the soft, comforting sound of water bubbling and flowing. After a short walk, she sat down on a bench in front of the OSI's Tranquility Fountain and stared into the streams of water, lost in her own thoughts.

- - - - - -

After a fruitless hour spent tossing around in his bed, Oscar got up and put on street clothes. He'd never suffered from insomnia before; usually, he was asleep before his head could even hit the pillow. In a way, he was glad Jaime would be going back to Ojai the next day, before things progressed any further.

_Stop kidding yourself, Goldman!_ His inner voice – just like Jaime's – raged and flailed against what his heart knew to be true. _You'd fall on your knees on the tarmac and beg her to stay, if that's what it would take._ What would it take, to convince Jaime to stay? _Don't even think about it! You **will not **throw away your entire career for the sake of a woman!_

Oscar decided that if he was this wide awake, he might as well accomplish something useful. There were more files and stacks of papers on his desk than hours in a day. Sighing with resignation, he got into his car and headed for his office. _Much better. Remember, your country needs you._ He was trying desperately to ignore the fact that, as much as the United States might need Oscar Goldman, Oscar, himself, needed _Jaime._

- - - - - -

Staring into the falling water only made Jaime feel worse. Instead of a cascading fountain, she saw thousands of tiny teardrops falling into melancholy streams. She didn't even notice her own tears beginning to slide down her cheeks until a soft voice behind her interrupted her reverie.

"I'd offer you a tissue, but they're up in my office." Oscar placed a gentle hand on Jaime's shoulder as he rounded the bench and sat down beside her. Without stopping to think about it, he reached over and brushed away her tears. "I'm a good listener, if you'd like someone to talk to."

Jaime nodded, smiling sadly at him. "Yeah, I guess we probably should...talk." _Get up, walk away. This isn't right,_ their inner voices screamed, in unheard unison. With Oscar's arm around Jaime's waist (for support, he told himself in justification), they entered the building, passed by the empty receptionist's station and boarded the express elevator.

They stood in the outer office, next to Callahan's desk, unsure what to do or say next. Neither one wanted to be the first to voice what was on both of their minds. Oscar knew he shouldn't be holding her, not even with a single 'supportive' arm, but his logic and reason had been defeated by Jaime's presence. Instead of letting her go, his other hand went to her shoulder, turned her to face him, then moved to her back. He was holding her in his arms now, in a manner that wasn't supportive or comforting but felt so good that neither of them even considered breaking away.

Their eyes grew wide, staring deeply into each other's souls, and Oscar held his breath as Jaime's arms moved up toward his shoulders and then around his body, making the embrace mutual and irresistible. They realized any questions or doubts they'd had could be answered by the eyes that gazed into their own, and they both knew they'd just crossed a line from which there would be no return. They knew it was wrong (for too many reasons to list), and they'd fought it valiantly for as long as they could. Now, with Jaime and Oscar in each other's arms for the very first time, wrong had melted to nothing; _this_ could only be right.

- - - - - -


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

"This...could be trouble..." Jaime whispered as she happily surrendered to the warmth of Oscar's arms.

"I'm pretty sure your boss will understand." Oscar finally allowed himself to run his fingers through her hair, and he smiled as he felt her lean into his touch. "The Secretary, on the other hand..." he added with reluctance.

"Oh, God..."

"The Secretary doesn't _have _to find out," Oscar said softly. His inner bureaucrat had lost out to a man who'd finally found all of his answers in the most beautiful pair of eyes he'd ever seen.

"I like the way you think," Jaime told him, "and you _did _train me in stealth..."

"Jaime, it's not me I'm worried about."

"Well, I'm not scared," she replied, closing the gap between them and searching his eyes, trying to let him know that while she was completely open to it, the next move _had _to be his. He had so much more to lose...

Cued by the depth of emotion in her eyes and the closeness of her body, Oscar got the message. He touched his lips very subtly to Jaime's, pausing to run a fingertip along her cheekbone before kissing her more fully. Gradually, they pulled each other even closer with their eyes wide open, and savored the contentment they'd discovered just by being together. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, they moved toward the inner office, closing the door behind them even though they were completely alone. They sank down onto the small office sofa, their lips breaking contact and their eyes suddenly beyond sadness, as the reality of the situation hit home.

"Oscar," Jaime began, her voice trembling with emotion, "what are we gonna do?"

- - - - - -

Several hours and a pot of coffee later, as Oscar and Jaime watched the sunrise from his office window, they were no closer to a resolution than they'd been in the middle of the night.

"It's not fair," Jaime sighed. "We're not breaking any laws."

"No, it's not fair, but it is Government Ethics 101."

"Then give me an "F" in the course; I'd rather have the teacher."

"Jaime..."

"Sorry."

"No," Oscar said, reluctantly stepping away from her. "I never should've let this -"

"Uh-uh; **_we _**let it happen. I don't think we could've stopped it, though, even if we tried."

"You're right."

Jaime grinned. "You'll find I usually am." Her smile vanished as she realized what had to come next. "I guess I should go before Callahan gets here."

Oscar nodded grimly. "Babe, if it was just the Secretary of State...I don't give a damn what he'd do to me – you're worth it – but being with me paints a big, red target on your back. The foreign factions who've been after me for years would love for me to have a weak spot. They'd grab you – or worse – in a heartbeat, to get to me."

"I'm pretty good at defending myself, ya know. Got a wicked right hook."

"Against a sniper on a rooftop, that helps...not at all."

"I know," she conceded, struggling not to cry. Without her memories of Steve, Jaime believed she'd never fallen this hard or this fast for any man. Fate had already taken her arm, her legs and a hefty chunk of her memory, making this loss – before they could really even begin – seem exceptionally cruel.

Each of her tears was like a separate dagger, straight into Oscar's heart. He took Jaime back into his arms, tenderly pulling her close. She buried her face in his chest and began to cry in earnest.

"I'm so sorry..." he whispered, stroking her hair and her back until her tension began to subside.

"We don't even know what we might have together," she told him wistfully. "We never even got the chance to try and find out...maybe it's better like this, when we don't know what we're losing..."

Oscar did know what they were about to lose, and he wasn't willing to give her up, in spite of his best intentions about her safety and their careers. He brushed the last of the tears from Jaime's face and kissed her softly. "We're going to find a way to do this, where we can see what we've got, and keep it if it's what we both want." He smiled reassuringly at her, hoping he sounded more certain than he really felt.

"I...don't want you to lose everything you've worked so hard for," Jaime said haltingly.

Oscar's fingertips moved across her face, burning every nuance deep into his soul, then kissed her again, more passionately this time, his arms simply not willing to let her go. "Maybe I've finally found something else worth working for."

- - - - - -

Jaime kept her morning appointment with Rudy, then gloomily headed back to the OSI apartment to start packing for the flight back to California. Her heart was weighing heavy with guilt and longing, but she'd resigned herself to the fact that what she and Oscar might've begun had to remain in the realm of the unknown. The car would be coming soon to take her to the airport, but her limbs moved and felt like lead as she tried to stuff her feelings down to someplace where they wouldn't hurt anymore. _It's just not fair! _Her inner voice cried out, over and over again, to the point where she almost missed the knock on the door. _Car's early..._she thought. It took everything she had, to force herself to pick up her suitcases and head for the door.

The person waiting on the other side was no OSI driver. "Oscar?" she questioned. Silently, he took the suitcases from her hands and placed them back inside the apartment.

Oscar looked carefully into Jaime's face as he led her back into the apartment and closed the door. The emotions in his eyes made her heart sing and weep at the same time. "Don't go," he said in a gentle voice. "I don't want to lose you."

- - - - - -


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

They knew the world – Washington DC, in particular – would think they were wrong, but for Jaime and Oscar 'wrong' meant letting the world's intrusions tear them apart. Jaime had not only missed her flight – she'd canceled it. Every morning, they found a different off-the-beaten-path coffee shop to meet in for breakfast, always careful to bring along a briefcase and file folders, in case they were spotted. 'Status meetings' for Jaime in Oscar's office kept them from missing each other during the day, and their evenings were spent sharing dinners that were anything but businesslike, gazing at each other across candlelit tables and wondering how on Earth they'd ever be able to have a future together.

Their odyssey had to reach an impasse; it was inevitable. A budding relationship needed sunshine, begged to see the light of day, and this one had been relegated to spare moments hidden away in dark corners. It simply wasn't enough, and they both knew it. Just over a week into exploring their possibilities together, Oscar moved to kiss Jaime goodnight but instead of a warm glow in his eyes, she saw deep despondence.

"Oscar?"

Instead of kissing her, he sadly touched her face and took a step backward. "I can't keep doing this to you," he said in an anguished voice.

"What are you talking about?"

Oscar led her to the love seat by the fireplace and they sat down together. Jaime felt a heavy, sick feeling in the pit of her stomach as she instinctively realized what was coming.

"You're too young to live a life in hiding," he began, and Jaime closed her eyes to try to block out his words. "I have no right to make you live this way."

"Oscar, this has been the happiest week of my life!" Jaime protested.

"And the most difficult."

"You're not forcing me into anything!"

"Jaime -"

"Don't do this..." Even before she'd spoken the words, Jaime knew Oscar had made up his mind; the worry lines had returned to his face, deeper than she'd ever seen them.   
"Jaime, in the last week, you've made me feel things I never thought I _could_ feel – that I'd sworn years ago to never _allow_ myself to feel, but -"

"No! There is no 'but'! If this is what we have to do for now, then so be it. I'm ok with that."

"I'm not." _Tell her the truth, Goldman. _But he knew he wouldn't; he simply couldn't do that. "Besides, we don't know how long 'for now' might have to last. That's not fair to you -"

"I'm not complaining -"

"I'm sorry, Jaime, but you know as well as I do that it can't work this way." Oscar couldn't bear to see her crying, so he kissed her quickly and left before he could change his mind. As he made his way to the car, he wished that the assassins who'd made such a convincing threat to his life that afternoon would just take him out, then and there.

- - - - - -

_What the **hell** was that? _Jaime's tears were angry ones. Oscar had been fine that morning at breakfast, and still seemed ok when they'd caught a few minutes together that afternoon. Why would he have done such an abrupt about-face? He was keeping something from her; that much, she was sure of. Reluctance and regret had colored his every word, and his kiss spoke of feelings and tenderness that opposed the awful words he'd spoken.

_Who's forcing you to do this, Oscar? s_he wondered. Having to steal the little bits of time they'd gotten to spend together made every moment more intense; every second _had_ to count. They'd both sensed they were finding something very special and neither one had been willing to let it go. One of them still wasn't.

What if he did mean it? A small part of Jaime wondered if the age difference or the pressure of having to see each other only in secret had proved too much for Oscar to bear. No that couldn't be true – he'd done a complete 180. _The Secretary of State! _Had they been discovered and Oscar's job threatened? Or was he facing a more ominous threat? Jaime climbed into bed for what she knew would likely be a sleepless night, intending to find him first thing in the morning.

- - - - - -

"Hi, Jaime!" Marsha, the receptionist at the main desk, was her usual chirpy self, even at 8am. "Are you here to see Doctor Wells?"

"No. I've got something I need to run past Oscar; is he upstairs?"

Marsha lost her smile. "He is, but I'm afraid you can't go up there. He's in a meeting, and it must be a biggie – security codes for his elevator have been disabled."

"For how long?" Jaime asked, feeling fear in the pit of her stomach.

"He didn't say. I'm sorry."

Jaime nodded sadly. "Thanks."

"Did you wanna leave a message for him?" Marsha offered, but Jaime was already pushing the huge glass door open, and she didn't turn around.

Jaime headed slowly back toward her car, then stopped, wondering what the hell she was supposed to do now. She'd stayed in DC solely to spend time with Oscar. She figured she should probably make plane reservations and start packing her things, but she couldn't face that – not yet, and not without _answers._ Wearily, she sank down onto the concrete edge of the Tranquility Fountain, feeling anything but tranquil, and wondering what had happened. Was the Secretary up there, and what kind of ugliness was Oscar facing? _It's my fault. I should've listened to him last week, when he said getting involved was a bad idea. He could be getting fired, right now...! _Jaime had been sitting there for half an hour when a voice stole her away from her thoughts.

"Jaime? How come you're back so soon?"

_Steve. _"Back...from where?" she asked, genuinely puzzled.

"From California," Steve replied. "I mean, you just went home a week ago; I thought you'd get some decent downtime before he called you back out here." Jaime didn't answer him, and Steve sat down beside her, noticing the single tear she tried to blink away before he could see it. "Jaime, what's wrong?"

"I...I can't talk about it..."

"You can tell me anything; you know that. We're still friends, right?"

"Yeah...but I...can't tell you here."

"Go for a walk?" Steve suggested.

Jaime nodded. She trusted Steve, and she _had _to talk to someone. She just hoped he wouldn't hate her when she told him the truth.

- - - - - -


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Steve let Jaime take the lead, since she seemed to have a destination in mind. Several times, he had to force himself not to wrap a protective arm around the woman he'd loved more than any other. He'd assumed she was heading toward the river, but he was wrong. Jaime stopped just inside a grove of trees and seated herself on a large rock. As Steve jumped up next to her, his heart ached when he saw the empty, despondent look in her eyes. He waited, but she stayed silent.

"Should I guess?" he asked gently. "Rough assignment?"

"I'm...not here to work," Jaime finally told him. "Steve, I never went back to California."

"Then why -?" An awful possibility hit him. "Did Rudy find something during your physical?"

"No." Jaime turned to look at him. "Why were you at Headquarters this morning?"

"Oscar needed to see me. He asked if I'd heard from you, if you were alright."

"Really?"

Steve frowned, putting pieces together in his head. "My God...you're the woman that they -"

"...that they _what?_" Jaime wondered.

_Great going, Steve – open mouth, insert both feet._ "Never mind. We came here to talk about you, and whatever put that look in your eyes."

"Steve Austin, you _know _something."

He'd never lied to her before, never could, and Steve struggled to find a truthful answer that wouldn't betray a confidence.

**_"Steve -"_**

"You're still in DC because you've been seeing Oscar," he said, very quietly.

"How'd you know that?" Jaime's face paled. "Did something happen to him? Is that why they called you in?"

"No; he's ok. Look, I'll tell you what I can, but I wanna hear about _you _first. That's the deal – take it or leave it."

Jaime started at the beginning, and once the floodgates were open, it all spilled out: how she and Oscar had both tried to fight their growing interest, the secret meetings whenever they could manage to steal away, the way their feelings had mushroomed in intensity in such a short time and the abrupt way Oscar had broken it off the previous evening. "The Oscar who walked out of that apartment last night isn't the same man I've gotten to know this week," Jaime concluded. "Something happened; something is wrong."  
"You're right," Steve conceded.

"Steve, please..."

"Do you love him?"

"It's only been a week...!"

"Which is more than enough time for Jaime Sommers to figure out what her heart is telling her. You forget how well I know you. It's none of my business, if you don't wanna tell me, but I wouldn't ask without an important reason." Steve tried to read Jaime's suddenly stoic face. "So...do you love him?"

"Yes."

Steve nodded and gave her a calm, reassuring smile. "Good." He took Jaime's hand and gently pulled her off the rock. "Let's go."

"But you haven't told me what happened to him!" Jaime protested.

"No, I haven't, because I'm taking you straight to the source. Oscar needs to make this right; **_he _**needs to tell you the truth."

- - - - - -

When Steve and Jaime returned to OSI Headquarters, they were stopped at the curb; the building was on lock-down, with flocks of penguin-suited G-men and Secret Service agents swarming everywhere. Instantly, Jaime _knew._ "Oscar wasn't getting fired – there was some kind of a threat!"

"Worse than that," Steve admitted. "They took an actual shot at him. But -"

"No...!"

"Jaime, he's ok, but that was yesterday. I don't know what's up with the suits."

Jaime stepped forward and started to move between the barriers, toward the building, but Steve grabbed her arm. "Let me; you'll never get past the Fed Squad."

"Watch me."

"Jaime, listen: I've got a special pass. I'll check on Oscar, find out anything I can and then get you in there somehow. In the meantime, **_wait here._**" She didn't answer, and Steve could almost see the wheels turning double-time inside her head. "Jaime -"

"What? Yeah, ok – not moving," she lied.

Steve looked at her suspiciously, but there wasn't time to argue. "I'll be back as soon as I can." He flashed the ID he'd been given that morning, entered the building, then punched his emergency code into the elevator and headed for the top floor.

There were four more "penguins" between the elevator and the door to the inner office. Steve held out the ID badge and kept on walking. Oscar was sitting behind his desk with Rudy Wells hovering over him. His shirt was partially unbuttoned and a bandage was visible on his left shoulder. The arm, itself, was in a sling.

Steve was stunned; he hadn't been gone _that _long. "What happened?"

"They tried again," Oscar said grimly. "I was on my way to a meeting next door, and as soon as I stepped outside -"

Rudy glanced at Steve. "I need to have a look at his X-rays. Keep an eye on him for me, make sure he stays put. As in, _off his feet_."

Steve nodded. "You got it." Once he and Oscar were alone, Steve closed the inner door. "Probably a good thing Jaime wasn't with you," he said softly.

"Jaime? Why would she -"

"Oscar, I know all about it. I ran into her outside, when I left here earlier. She was...pretty upset."

"Is she ok?" Oscar asked quickly.

"No – she isn't. She's worried, she's hurt and, if I know Jaime – which I do - she's madder than hell that you didn't tell her the truth."

"You told her?" Oscar groaned.

"No. That's your job. You _have _to talk to her; let her make up her own mind. You owe her that much."

"Where is she now?"

"Outside; she doesn't have a 'penguin pass'." Steve moved to the farthest window, the one that looked out toward the fountain and the front sidewalk. "_Dammit, Jaime..."_ he said softly. Steve was interrupted before he could tell Oscar that Jaime wasn't where he'd left her. The echo of an explosion very nearby shook the building, and while Steve and Oscar got their bearings, the window directly behind Oscar abruptly flew open, and they were no longer alone.

- - - - - -


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Steve, who had instantly jumped forward to shield Oscar, stared at the newcomer in disbelief. "Jaime? I told you I'd come and get you; the door would've been so much easier."

Jaime shook herself off, brushing away the debris and dust. "Yeah, well I couldn't wait that long. Neither could the bomb."

Both men's heads nearly whiplashed as they turned to face her. "What bomb?"

"Oscar, what happened?" Jaime asked, moving swiftly to his side and further opening his shirt to see the bandage. "Oh, no..."

Oscar's entire body relaxed at the gentle touch of her hands. "I'm alright," he said in response, and also for the benefit of the army of Feds that had begun bursting through the door, alerted by the explosion. Jaime immediately stepped back to hovering distance but her eyes never left him, even as she addressed the G-men.

"You swept the building and the grounds, but obviously no one thought to check the window ledge. He could've been killed! Outstanding job, Gentlemen. You can find what's left of the bomb somewhere in the woods behind us. I suggest you start looking for evidence before someone else finds it first."

Oscar nodded in confirmation. "I'll be perfectly safe here, with my new bodyguard," he told the 'suits'.

"Maybe I can find what they won't," Steve suggested. "I've got my datacom, so I'll let you know if we find anything. The two of you – _talk_, please?" He followed the G-men, closing the door to give his friends some privacy.

"Are _you _ok?" Oscar asked quietly as Jaime pulled a second chair behind the desk to sit next to him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were threatened?"

"I'm always being threatened; it comes with the territory." He finally looked into the only pair of eyes that could make his heart melt. "Jaime, these idiots didn't threaten _me_; they threatened **_us_**." Oscar opened the top drawer of his desk and pulled out a small tape player, wired to his telephone. "This call came yesterday." He pressed 'play', and an odd, obviously disguised voice snarled with ugliness.

_"We missed today; consider it your only warning. You're a dead man, Goldman, and if your sweet little lady friend is with you, we'll just have to take her out, too."_

The tape clicked off, and Oscar looked at Jaime with dark, serious eyes. "Usually, threats by phone or through the mail are an attempt to terrorize and not a serious danger. True assassins don't broadcast their plans in advance."

"But...they shot you. Not to mention the little gift on your window sill," Jaime pointed out.

"Right. These could be three totally separate incidents, and I deal with this garbage all the time, but when your safety is in question...I couldn't take the chance."

Jaime reached over and brushed a stray hair from Oscar's face. "Is that the OSI Director talking?"

Oscar smiled. "No...just Oscar, who really cares about you."

"Care so much that you left? So much that you couldn't confide in me?" Jaime asked softly. "We could've faced this together."

"I never wanted to leave you alone like that; I'm so sorry." Oscar surprised Jaime (and himself) by using his good arm to pull her onto his lap. When her arms gently circled around him, he lifted his head to tenderly kiss her. "I was wrong, Babe. _This..._isn't wrong."

Their lips met again, with every bit of urgency they felt in their hearts, stopping only when the insistent buzz of the datacom interrupted them. Jaime moved quickly back to her chair so Oscar could answer.

"Yes?"

"Call off the suits," Steve told them. "I've got your man."

"Oh?"

"We'll be on our way up. Tell Jaime she's got a great arm. His own bomb knocked the wind outta him." Jaime grinned, and listened as Steve went on. "I can handle this idiot, and I think you'll be wanting some quality time with him, so you'll want the penguins gone."

"I'm on it," Oscar said, turning off the device and picking up the phone. Minutes later, as the Feds were in full retreat, Jaime pulled her chair to the other side of the desk, her attention peaked.

"They're coming," she told Oscar. They both turned toward the door, eager to find out just who had caused this much trouble and pain.

When the inner door opened, Jaime was confused. To her, the man Steve was dragging with a bionic vice-grip on his arm was a stranger. Not to Oscar, though, whose face paled as his jaw involuntarily dropped with shock.

"My God...Oliver?" Oscar's voice was barely audible. "Why -?"

Steve threw the offender into a chair and secured him with handcuffs he'd 'borrowed' from a penguin. "Jaime, let's give them some time," he suggested, motioning in her direction. "We'll be right outside the door," he told the prisoner. "Don't even think about trying anything."

Once they were in the outer office, Steve answered Jaime's querying look. "That's Oliver Spencer. He crossed the 't's and dotted the 'i's that made me bionic."

"I thought Oscar -"

"No; Spencer was Director when I had my accident. He left – retired – soon after, but now it seems he hadn't been quite ready to go."

Jaime nodded, beginning to understand. "That's why he did all of this to Oscar? He blames him?"

"To both of you, and yeah – I guess so."

A _thud_ from inside the office startled them, and they rushed back to the door, but Oscar opened it first. With relief plainly visible on his face, he shook Steve's hand, then kissed Jaime's cheek. "It's over, thanks to both of you." He flexed his right fist and smiled broadly. "Hansen can come and get him now. Nice to know I've still got a right hook of my own."

- - - - - -


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Steve insisted that his two friends spend a much-needed evening alone together, and he'd decided to spend the next day tying up some loose ends. First, he stopped at Oscar's office, where things had calmed down considerably in 24 hours.

"Got time to talk?" he asked his friend (and boss).

"Of course."

"I hope you and Jaime were able to work things out and get back on track."

"Thanks to you, yes; we're fine now, but Pal, if this makes you uncomfortable in any way -"

"It doesn't; that's why I'm here," Steve told him. "To be totally honest, I'd give anything to have Jaime back in my arms and in my life, but realistically I know that's not gonna happen. It's so much easier for me to go on without her, now that she's with someone who truly cares about her – the way I know you do." He smiled at Oscar, to show there were no hidden hard feelings. "You do realize, though, that you've got a tough road ahead, with your position and all -"

"Yes."

"Well, I wanted to let you know you can count on me to help, in any way I can. The two of you are good together; you deserve a fighting chance."

"Thank you. I know Jaime would appreciate that, as well."

Steve nodded. "I'm gonna talk to her next...if you're ok with that."

"Steve, the two of you have been friends for most of your life. I'd never dream of interfering with that."

"Thanks. I know you'll be good to her -"

"Always."

The two men shook hands and Steve headed out for the second half of his day's mission.

- - - - - -

Jaime was on the phone when Steve knocked, and she motioned him inside. She hung up and greeted him with a hug. "I was just talking to Mom; she said to tell you to call once in awhile."

"I call them every week!"

"Kidding, Austin," she said, twirling away from him.

"You're in a happy mood," he observed.

"Yeah," Jaime answered, almost dreamily, "I am."

"I'm glad," he told her, meaning it.

"Steve, you've been so understanding about everything; I really appreciate it. I know how hard it must be..."

"My two favorite people are happy; if I had even a small part in that -"

"Which you did -"

"Then I'm happy, too. As long as you two don't cut me outta yours lives completely..."

"Never happen. In fact, you'll be seeing a lot more of me soon."

"Oh?"

"I'm moving...to DC!" Jaime exclaimed, practically dancing with newfound joy.

"With Oscar?"

"Hey – don't rush us. He's helping me find a place of my own, for now, anyway. As for the future, if we're meant to have one, who knows?"

"That's wonderful, Jaime; I'm so happy for both of you."

"You really mean that, don't you?"

"Never lied to you yet."

"Thank you, Steve – for everything."

- - - - - -

Jaime spent a few weeks back in Ojai, packing everything for her big move and just relaxing with Jim and Helen. Oscar flew out when he could – a day here, a week-end there – and was immediately accepted as extended family. The Elgins could see how strong the bond had grown between him and their 'daughter', and happily gave their blessing. Two nights before Jaime was to leave for her new home, Oscar flew out again and was the guest of honor at a family dinner that also included Steve. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that they were now a family of five.

The next morning, Jaime surprised Oscar by showing up very early at his hotel with a large wicker basket in her hand. "A breakfast picnic!" she chirped. " C'mon – we can take it down to the beach. I brought a blanket, too. And plenty of coffee." _He looks like a little boy when he's half asleep..._

"Ok; you talked me into it." Oscar stepped into the hall, but Jaime held up one hand, grinning at him.

"No, ya don't," she said playfully. "Black dress shoes on the beach? I don't think so." She pointed back into his room. "The shoes stay here."

"Jaime -"

"You want this fresh, hot coffee, or not?"

Oscar gave her a huge mock sigh, then removed both of his shoes and tossed them back into the room. Still, Jaime didn't move.

"Oscar..."

_"_You win," he told her, removing his socks as well.

Once they were comfortably set up at the edge of the surf, Oscar couldn't resist taking Jaime into his arms for a very long, slow kiss. He'd never imagined that halfway through his life, in the position he'd achieved, his heart could possibly feel this full.

"Sure you're ready to move all the way across the country, just to be with this old man?" he asked softly, savoring the way she fit so well in his arms.

"I've never been more sure of anything." Jaime kissed him again, and her heart told her the time had come. "I...love you, Oscar," she told him, gazing through his eyes directly into his soul. Whatever problems and roadblocks life intended to throw their way, they would face them – and beat them – together.

END


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